Welcome back! Long time, no see. Well, long time, never see. There's no face-to-face interaction involved here. Anyway, I hope you...

Welcome back! It's lovely to see you again. Well... it would be, if I could see you, I'm sure. You get the gist. Welcome back. In this...

So, if you weren't aware, I've written a novel. My very first, actually. And, despite sales being slow, I am incredibly proud of myself....